Nur Zakuan
writing to a non-audience pleases me.
August 2007 September 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009
i am officially confused. my head is not on properly.im so outa it.its amazing.so many good, fantastical, super duper , yippy kah yay things are happening now.it seems like everything is falling into place.finally.BUTsomehow im here.feelin like crap.Blogging.I think im jaded somehow.FUCK!moodswings sial. somemore. its not cos of my period, or rather , it cant be.aiyah, i duno la.
maybe nurul's right. TOO much is happening. and i cant bloody keep up.
im drowning. im stretched too thin. I NEEEEEEEEEEEEED A BREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAK.
But yet.
i need this in my life.i need this constant motion.but yet again....im drowning.so how? ok so, a break down of wats goin on for me. and YES.. i know its been ages since I last posted.1) i graduated 3 weeks ago. with neal, maurice, su lyn, syed . i know. im spsed to b all happy happy joy joy abt it right? but to be honest. it was so much more 4 my mom & popo. 
me? 
i got drunk the nite b4, woke up w a hangover & picked up the next shirt i saw, pulled a skirt over my beer belly & yeah. pics wil be up LATER.malas now.no mood
2) i have a beer belly now. i hate it. so many ppl hav commented on my sudden weight gain. so much so that, iv started gymmin. i HATE gymmin. but im that desperate.
my logic is.. i gym so i can drink more :D hehe. 3) im hungover at work on most days. and im on facebook 24/7.4) i lost my phone. AGAIN. it dropped outa neal's car when we went to pick mamie & ayu ( my 2 japanese best friends from tokyo) up from klia. fckin smart i tell u. ughhh! geram-ness!5) my jap friends were down. we went to langkawi. i cant remember half of what happened there cos i was drunk 80% of the time. all i know is.. that eating & drinkin form a vicious cycle.
i drink. then i get hungry. then i eat. then i get annoyed cos im too sober. so i drink again. n so it goes on. 6) i put on 3 kgs & i cant fit into most of my pants anymore. even my paintball pants feel tight. D-I-E7) iv been hangin w a new crowd. made up of completely new ppl + old friends whom iv lost touch w 4 ages + random ppl. i like . i like alot.
8) my new lady boss likes me. yay! double yay as well cos there was talk abt a promotion of sorts in the near future. fooyoohhh... cun
9) i need to get my tattoo done. like soon. and redye my hair.10) im gettin my new phone tonite .finally. i can die i tell u .. tryin to use this old fuctup fon of mine. 11) odio is leaving for london on wed. fuck. im actually gona miss her (-_-)
12) nini is back. yay!
13) iv been meetin so many new ppl . most of whom i cant remember cos im usually tipsy. or. i say i am cos i just cant bloody remember them.
14) i havent seen anita in bloody fckin ages. its weird. i havent seen nurul either. 15) its our bdays soon. cant wait 4 this weekend. iv got a crate of beer + 2 bottles of vodka + 1 bottle of bacardi + 1 bottle of chivas. okla fine. better not finish all. later really die.
16) my paintball team - Ronin Legion won 3rd in the Cyberjaya tourny. bloody embarrassment. only thing good was the cute lil trophy we got. and we got a new website that looks super duper cool + jules is takin lotsa photos of us :) we are such a vain team! haha!
17) 1 promised to stay sober at least 1 nite a week.. on mondays. dammit. Thats TONITE (>-<)
omg. this post is a mess. i cant be bothered to edit it.n yes. thats just how out of it i am. fuck it. im goin home.
its no wonder my hairstylist says im balding. oh wait, that was my mom. grrr ! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH !!!
*runnin around wildly pullin my hair out**woooooosah* tryin hard to stay positive .. in with the good energies & out with the bad.. *bleahhh*
never knew wat the big deal about havin a lady boss was...until TODAY.never knew asking for 2 days off from work was gona be such a hassle.until TODAY.its 2 days lady... 2 days! AND they're not even back 2 back *mutters to self*
But thou shall not be thrown off. I have yet to work my magic on her. just she wait. she'll be loving me. uhuh. and yes. this is me tryin to psyche myself. tell myself that another 10 months of being under her*slaps self on head for allowin my imagination wander to VERY VERY dangerous places*
*ooh.. that sounds.... interesting *
aah. I'll survive. Heck! I'll do more than survive. I'll learn to like it. Put your mind to something & just deal with it. Its not like I can do anything about it, so yeah.
on a MUCH brighter note.. all hail"HALLELUJAH !!!! PRAISE THE ...... MAID"
finally.... finally ... finally... after months of torture & self-inflicted ignorance & blindness of sorts ( to my hell hole of a room).. i walked into my room yesterday to see....
THE FLOOR !!!!
All stand up and say "HALLLLLLELLUJAHH" *breaks into song & dance ala those hyper church youth band ppl who wave their hands up in the air, clap & jump around in prayer*
hihi
and then kan.. i woke up this morning, stepped outside my room &... the floor was mopped !!
i was WELL impressed, mind you. and so now, i wont mind so much invitin company over *pheewww*
no more feelin like cinderella over laundry( altho a part of me secretly enjoyed it cos it made my arms more toned, haha!).
no more turnin a blind eye to my sofa cum closet. YES im a brat. i admit it. but seriously. juggling work + social life + me time AND laundry ... dayumn !
its not the putting in. i jus cant be arsed to wait around for an hour to put it in the dryer , and then wait around for yet another hour, to take it out. this is all when i can be nicely out n about?!
so yes, RESTEC-PA to those of you who do your own.
me? im fine being a brat. so sue me.
Random moments of the week
Firstly, I was home on a Sat nite. Sick. and YES im still sore about that.
Went to No Black Tie to catch the Merdeka Showcase. It was nothing short of F-A-B! plus i got to see my amazingly-busy-catch-me-if-u-can best friend , Miss Anita Ibrahim Woo ( as she now calls herself on Facebook), that was all good. and then...
when i went to pick her up
Her - OMG Amor.. u look so cute
Me - *blushing cos i hate it when she uses that word, grrr*
yea yea yea, come on now babe, hurry up, odens waitin in the car
Her - Wait a minute! Are you wearing SLIPPERS ????
Me - Ya, doh ! it so goes w my outfit *prancin around*
Her - @_@
Me - Aiyah, of cos not la. My shoes are in the car. Now hurry up already
Got there. NO shoes. >_<
Babs asked me out 4 drinks on sunday nite.
Her - Eh, come la. go 4 a drink somewhere
Me - Ala.. cannot la. I shouldn't be drinking. Got gastric la.
Her - Then just get something with juice la. Juice is good wat?
Great sense of logic my friends have la I tell you.
Visited my old old fren Ady-lian-a.
Her not so small dachshund runs into the room, yappin & jumpin all over the place.
Her - NOOO!!! No Candy !! Out!!! Get out now!!
Candy - *still prancin around in room* *stops to sniff into Bab's probably stinky bag*
Her - Candyyyyyyyyyyy... HAIRDRYER !!!!!
Me & Babs - @_@
Candy is afraid of the hairdryer.
The things ppl say these days I tell you.
Amazing.